


Finding Life

by pmw



Series: (Jasper) Post shattering [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Explicit Language, Jasper Redemption (Steven Universe), Post-Canon, Post-Steven Universe Future, post-suf
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:00:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24180967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pmw/pseuds/pmw
Summary: Post-canon continuation of my first fic, “Find something better to do with your life.”Jasper has started tracking down the remaining corrupted gems, and is finding herself getting more confident/ comfortable with her fellow Quartzes.Era 3 is starting to look up for Jasper.
Series: (Jasper) Post shattering [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743868
Comments: 21
Kudos: 54





	1. Spooring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jasper hunts down a corrupted gem, for a more pleasant reason than she used to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you don’t want to read the first story in this series, all you have to know is:
> 
> -4 months happened between Jasper being shattered, and Steven saying goodbye to Beach City.  
> -Jasper broke her cave in a bit of tantrum/breakdown after Steven made it clear he didn’t want her around  
> -Connie eventually befriended Jasper by trying to be be as stubborn as her, and by giving a couple of her classic ‘put your feelings aside’ speeches.  
> -After an encounter with a corrupted gem, Jasper decides to track down the remaining ones to be healed (but doesn’t start until after Steven leaves).  
> -Jasper plays sports with other Quartzes now, and is starting to make friends.

The Crystal Gems had worked with Blue Pearl over the last few months, to draw and document what the corrupted gems they could remember looked like. Pearl was able to make a hologram of them for Blue Pearl to draw.

For the ones she hadn’t seen herself, Pearl was able to fuse with one of the other Crystal Gems who had seen it, and produce a hologram for Blue Pearl to draw from the accessed memories in the fusion.

For the most part, Garnet was more of a help than Amethyst had been.

They had documented Jasper’s corruption. It was one of the only corrupted gems that Pearl needed help with, that Amethyst was able to help with.

Jasper had been horrified when she had first seen her corrupted form, but she was able to control her expression for what felt like the first time in a long time.

Seeing her corrupted form somehow made everything feel more real- she was already painfully aware of the fact that she had been corrupted, but she had completely lost her connection with her gem at the time. She couldn’t remember what had happened after she fully corrupted, which included what she looked like.

But that didn’t matter at this time.

Jasper felt the dirt beneath her bare feet as she walked through the forest. It wasn’t her forest, she had warped to the other side of the country and walked for a few hours.

Since playing sports with the other Quartzes, Jasper found herself accustomed to walking barefoot.

She was following a trail of unnatural breaks through the Forrest. Trees had been dented or knocked over entirely, and plants on the ground had been flattened.

Her grip tightened around the material axe in her left hand. Bismuth had made her the weapon.

She figured Jasper would want a Quartz weapon, and when Jasper tried to tell her not to go to the trouble, Bismuth refused to back down. She said it was more humane to slice the form quickly, with a sharp axe, rather than pounding her helmet into it.

Jasper didn’t fully believe her reasoning, feeling like Bismuth was trying to be nice, but decided against arguing.

The axe was silver, double bladed, and even Jasper had to admit it was beautifully crafted. In that moment though, anyone wouldn’t be able to tell. Jasper had covered the blades in mud, so that the sunlight wouldn’t reflect off of it, giving away her position to a corrupted gem.

She learnt that lesson the hard way.

Jasper had decided to cover it in mud, because it was the only non permanent way she could think of to remove the reflective aspect. She didn’t want to paint over the blades. She wasn’t going to ruin her gift.

It wasn’t long before the path of destruction, that awfully reminded Jasper of her own, led her to the corrupted gem she had been tracking. She positioned herself behind a tree, the gems back was facing her, and it didn’t seem to have heard her. Yet.

She knew it would be more effective to hold her breath, but these days she preferred to breathe. She felt free when she was breathing, and trapped when she wasn’t. She was positioned behind a tree, feeling herself slowly breathe in an out, watching the corrupted gem.

Waiting for it to get closer.

She had used a similar tactic in the Beta Kindergarten against Amethyst. While she had been standing there, talking to the corrupted gem, she pretended not to know the others were there. She did that to mess with her, wait until she got close enough to taunt her.

This time however, she was waiting for the gem to get closer so that she could dissipate the gem in the shortest fight possible. She loved a good fight, and these corrupted gems gave a good fight, but it was a worthless fight. Jasper would much rather fight gems who were in control of themselves.

This wasn’t about fighting, this was about righting a wrong.

It was someone else’s wrong, but she didn’t mind. Usually she would mind, she hates cleaning up after other people, and that had basically been what her escort jobs had been for the last few thousand years.

Jasper watched silently as the gem she was watching started sniffing at the bushes near the tree Jasper was behind.

The only problem Jasper had with her gem placement is that she wasn’t aware of any scent she would give off- although she was okay with not being able to use smell to track things down. She was good at tracking, even without a sense of smell.

The gem began to sniff closer and closer to the tree, before it suddenly stopped. Jasper quickly jumped out from behind the tree, and raised the axe in her hand above her head, before the corrupted gem lowered her head and slammed it into Jaspers chest.

She was knocked onto her back, dropping the axe and instinctively summoning her helmet in the process.

 _‘You can be ruthless and humane Jasper, you don’t have to sacrifice your strengths to be a better person._ ’

Bismuth’s advice rung in the back of her mind, making Jasper groan. She had to quickly roll towards her axe to avoid the full weight of the corrupted gem coming down on her form.

Jasper was able to grab the axe, and turn to face the corrupted gem. There was a crater in the ground were jasper was just seconds before, and the gem that created it was running towards Jasper again. This time when the gem leapt up to jump onto Jasper, she moved out of the way.

Jasper jumped above the gem as she created a second crater in the ground, and bring down her axe with full force, decapitating the gem. The corrupted gem’s head hit the ground before her form dissipated. Her gem at Jasper’s feet.

She leant down and picked up the gem in her spare hand. The way she held it, it reminded her of when she almost shattered Amethyst, right before that human-fusion got involves. She shook her head and quickly bubbled the gem, before she began to walk towards the nearest warp pad.

This wasn’t the first corrupted gem she had tracked down, it was either her fifth or sixth. The first two times, she had company while tracking them, but this time she was alone.

Jasper had found she preferred to carry the bubbles back to the temple, rather than sending them off, or having someone else handle it. She wasn’t entirely sure where they would end up if she did send them off...

It would be best for her to focus on walking. So she did that. However, after some time she became too focused on the walking itself, and not where she was placing her feet.

She had come across a stream, and her foot sunk into mud.

She grunted. “Fucking disgusting.”

She removed her foot and shook off some of the mud. She walked over to a large rock and sat down, putting her feet in the stream. She chucked the weapon into the stream.

The water wasn’t string enough to wash the weapon away, but it did slowly remove all the mud Jasper had caked onto it. She much preferred how the axe looked when it wasn’t dirty.

She sat there for longer than she needed to. The gem was in her lap, and she rested her face in her palms, her elbows on her knees.

She began to gently rub her index fingers on what would be her cheekbones if she had actual bones. Jasper had learnt all about bones and organs, and for the most part it disgusted her.

She had considered shapeshifting herself some bones, she had watched a lot of videos, and thought it looked interesting when the humans bones would pop through their skin as they broke.

It had been a few weeks since Steven left Beach City. Jasper wasn’t sure if it had been six or eight weeks. After her shattering, she found herself counting the sunrises as they came, but before then she wasn’t one for keeping track of time.

She noticed, in that sense, she was returning back to ‘normal’. She almost found comfort in the fact that she kept loosing track of time, it was better than being anxious, waiting for the hours to tick over, for the sun to rise.

Jasper hadn’t had contact with Steven since he left, and she had mostly lost the desire try to. She didn’t have the right to, regardless of if she wanted to or not.

Plus, it was easier to come to terms with the fact that she wasn’t wanted by her diamond, when she was wanted by her fellow Quartzes.


	2. Congratulations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bismuth tries to tell a newly woken up Jasper, that she’s been doing a good job with the corrupted gems.

Waking up with a blanket over her head was oddly comforting for Jasper. Sometimes when she woke up she would feel the cold on parts of her body, and would know she had moved in her sleep.

Connie told her that it was Spring. The mornings began cold, and it was quickly warm before midday. Apparently Summer was next, which meant it would be hot all day.

Jasper couldn’t help but laugh. She wondered if she emerged in the summer, or if her sandstone kindergarten was one of the places where it was hot all year around. Jasper learnt about deserts when she was doing the research of the types of conditions different ecosystems provided, like Connie had asked.

She thought she had it all understood until she learnt about cold deserts.

A knock on the door made Jasper groan. Jasper pulled the blanket off of her face, and wrapped it around her body, holding it together at her chest. She had fallen asleep on the floor next to her table.

She hadn’t even fully opened the door before Bismuth was inside her house.

The light from outside hurt Jasper’s eyes. She had obviously slept in. With the downstairs window still covered, it was a lot darker than her bedroom. The sunrise can’t wake her up if it’s only lighting up the staircase.

“I hear you found another corrupted gem! Came here to congratulate you.”

Jasper closed the door and rubbed her eyes. She always had bags under her eyes, but she always felt the most aware of them shortly after waking up. 

“Why would I need to be congratulated for doing my job?” Jasper’s words almost slurred together. She didn’t understand why waking up was such a struggle, she had done thousands of years without sleeping and never felt as tired as when she has just woken up.

She would complain, but she liked sleeping too much. She felt the ends justified the means. The temporary groggy feeling of the morning was worth it- although she preferred it when she was alone for that stage of the morning.

“Damn Jasp. Did I wake you up?”

“I don’t know, did you?”

“You look and sound it.”

Jasper crossed her arms, wrapping the blanket around her tighter. “Yeah, there’s a reason for that.” Bismuth laughed as Jasper muttered to herself.

“Anyways, you only started this corrupted gem business seven weeks ago. You’ve already safely bubbled six gems! That’s almost one a week. That’s worth a congratulations or two in my eyes.”

“Four.”

“No, pretty sure its six Jasp.”

“I wasn’t alone for the first two.”

“Yeah but you still poofed and bubbled them, even if you had supervision.” Jasper grunted instead of responding. 

“It was more than supervision. They held the gem down. It wasn’t even necessary.” Jasper kept on snapping her sentences, and Bismuth picked up on it.

“Oh I see what’s going on.”

“What?”

“You’re not a morning person.”

Jasper sighed loudly. “I’m not a person.”

“No, I mean, you’re grumpy in the mornings.”

She rolled her eyes. “Ask the right people, and they’d tell you it doesn’t have to be morning for me to be grumpy.”

Bismuth laughed. Her laugh was always contagious, it seemed to be something she was well known for. While she didn’t laugh often, Jasper found herself giving a small smile whenever she made Bismuth laugh. 

Jasper was sure she noticed almost every time, but for whatever reason, Bismuth very rarely commented on it. 

Bismuth noticed a gleaming light out of the corner of her eye. She looked over to see the axe she had made for Jasper leaning against a pot of dirt at the bottom of the stairs.

“How’s she treating you?”

“Who?” Bismuth nodded towards the axe. Jasper followed the nod, but was still confused. “Do you mean the axe? What... what do you mean?”

Bismuth laughed again, but this time Jasper just raised her eyebrow instead of smiling. “I mean, do you like it? How are you finding using it?” Jasper watched Bismuth pick it up and flip it over in her hand. It seemed like she was admiring her own work.

“Yeah it’s alright.”

“Just alright? Do you want me to alter it?”

Jasper put her hands in front of her, she seemed to have gotten good at moving without the blanket falling off of her.She was definitely better at it than when she was first introduced to earth blankets. “No, no. It’s good, you don’t need to do anything. I’m just not used to using it yet.”

Bismuth was the one to raise an eyebrow this time. “Been a while since the war, huh? I get it if you’re rusty. No shame in that.”

“I never used an axe during the war.”

“Whaaat! No way, I thought they would have chosen you to get an axe. Even with supply shortages. You were a good soldier, surely they’d try and give you as much as an advantage as possible.”

Jasper rubbed the back of her neck. She stepped over to the table and started to pack away the notebooks and stationary she had been using the previous night. 

She didn’t know why she felt so awkward talking about the war- she was proud to be a soldier. It was one of the only things she was proud of herself for. Maybe it felt awkward because she was talking about it to a former enemy?

“They did choose me, I declined the offer.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t think I needed one.”

“Of course, such a well built quartz as yourself would do a fine job without one.” Jasper had to step a foot forward to steady herself, as Bismuth slapped her on the back without warning. “A material weapon is still a good thing to have.”

Playing sports with the other Quartzes quickly made Jasper realise that a slap on the back wasn’t always an attack. It was still jarring for Jasper, but part of her felt like this showed she was being included, and she liked that.

“I know that now... your axe is well made. I don’t think I’ve thanked you”

“There’s no need, I’m always happy to make a weapon... If you ever want to come and make one yourself, I’d always be wiling to help. I’m busy with classes a lot, but you could actually join in on a class or two. I know you’re not enrolled, but I teach gems to make weapons, or armour, or whatever they can think of. If you want to make anything out of metal, I’m the gem to go to.” 

Bismuth used her thumb to point at her gem, with a large toothy grin on her face. Jasper hummed at herself for a second, before turning around to face Bismuth, who was standing in front of the door with the axe’s blade close to her face. “I don’t overly want to join any class...”

“I get that, you don’t have to. Just an offer, besides I’m usually not busy around sundown. You could come around on a Friday or Saturday- when there’s no school the next day so it doesn’t matter if we’re making noise late.” 

Bismuth winked at Jasper, who frowned in confusion. “I don’t know what the rotations- I mean, days are. I just count the sunrises.”

Bismuth tossed the axe in front of her, catching it part way down the handle. She held the bottom of the handle towards Jasper, who took it and leant it against the wall at the top of the smaller set of stairs that went nowhere. 

Bismuth looked at the various items Jasper had put on there, it seemed like she was using it as a set of shelves. There was a pair of glasses on the second highest step along with a small box, and six small different types of rocks on the step under it. There wasn’t anything else on the other steps.

She thought that was probably the best use for it, it was originally going to have a purpose, but they ended up putting a wall up instead. They never got around to removing it, but Jasper had said to just leave it when she offered to remove it. She had removed the things next to it when she offered.

“Well, today is Wednesday, so Friday is two sunrises from now, and Saturday is the day after... there’s no pressure. Just letting you know you have an open invitation.”

Bismuth suddenly put her hands on her hips, and spoke a bit louder. “I was just popping around to say hi, and tell you that you’re doing a great job with the corrupted gems. I’ve gotta head back to my little forge, I have another class in 10.”

Jasper tossed a pen into a container, and groaned to herself when it bounced out of the container and landed back on the table. She ignored it and went to open the door for Bismuth to walk out. 

Casual goodbyes were odd to Jasper. She was used to walking away from a conversation without warning. Most of the verbal interactions in her life had been in relation to some sort of mission where there was some form of plan, so she didn’t need to communicate that she was leaving, or why. But there was ver little formal structure in her life now, so she had to start getting used to saying goodbye.

Jasper gave a wave as Bismuth walked out the door, something she had learnt from Connie when she had first started to visit her cave. Bismuth quickly turned to face Jasper after she walked out the door, making sure Jasper doesn’t close the door. Jasper tended to close the door very quickly after a gem walked out.

“Oh hey, before I go. Pearl wanted me to tell you she’s planning on taking the gems you bubbled down to the sanctuary. She thought it would be nice if you helped her with healing them, and explaining Era 3 to them.”

Jasper lent against the open door, one hand was resting on top of the door, and the other kept her blanket wrapped around her. She didn’t have time to respond before Bismuth continued to speak.

“I think she said two of them are Crystal Gems, but the others were Homeworld soldiers. Those gems would probably listen to you, more than her. She’s doing it in a about three hours. There’s no pressure to, I’m sure she would go find someone else to go if you don’t. Just, think about it.”


	3. A Quiet Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both Jasper and Pearl had the same idea to get to the fountain earlier, although for different reasons.

Rose’s sanctuary felt different than it had the first time Jasper was there. She hadn’t been back to the fountain since she reformed there. It felt both smaller and larger. The fountain wasn’t flooded, it didn’t need to be anymore. 

It was quiet. 

Of course it was.

There weren’t three large intergalactic dictators, sitting in a flooded fountain. There weren’t any of the remaining Crystal Gem’s standing around the water, or swimming in it. There weren’t any of the made or self proclaimed soldiers, who were suddenly finding themselves submerged in water, with scars all over their bodies, being told they haven’t been themselves for thousands of years.

Well, Jasper was there. So there was one war veteran, although she had discovered her scars a long time ago, and she was only out of action for a short amount of time. 

Jasper stood in front of the fountain, though she was avoiding her reflection in the water.

She was looking up at the larger statue of Rose, in the centre of the fountain. It was hard to grasp the concept that the gem she spent her whole life hating, was the same gem that gave her life.

The gem she was fighting against, was the same gem she was fighting for.

The statue looked so peaceful- was that how she was seen by the other crystal gems? Jasper had it drilled into her that Rose was a savage traitor, who would gladly betray everything for one shitty planet, and it’s dreadful organic life. 

The subject of Rose had been brought up once or twice, over the last two months that Jasper had been spending with other uncorrupted Quartzes. The ones who were Crystal Gems seemed to want to paint her as someone who cared about all life. 

Although she was a bit of a touchy subject these days, even for the gems who fought alongside her.

The statues of Rose around the fountain were much smaller than the one in the centre, closer to a more realistic height. Jasper had to crouch down slightly to look at the expression on the Rose statue closest to her. She walked around the fountain and noted all four statues had the same design.

Jasper found herself in front of the first statue she had taken a closer look at. Her form suddenly felt... weaker. She fell to her knees and found herself looking up at the statute. Or was the statue looking down at her?

‘Maybe peaceful was the wrong word. She looked tired. She looks so...’

“Sad.”

Jasper found that if she was concentrating, she was able to hear a warp stream connecting to the pad, seconds before the stream materialised. Which is exactly what Jasper found herself hearing the split second the word left her mouth.

She was able to messily push herself onto her feet, run, and lean against an inner wall of the sanctuary, before Pearl materialised with six orange bubbles. The wall cracked at Jasper suddenly ‘leaning’ on it, she had either miscalculated how fast she was going, or miscalculated hoe close the wall was.

Pearl was humming herself as she walked through the entrance, only stopping as she saw an orange figure out the corner of her eye. It made her jump and almost drop the bubbles.

“Oh, Jasper! I didn’t realise you would be here.”

“Bismuth said you requ- she said you suggested, for me to come along.”

“I did. It’s just... you’re early. I didnt expect you to be here for another hour- if you decided to show up. But no problem!” Pearl gently placed the bubbles on the ground in front of the fountain.

“I only measure time by the Sunrises, I don’t measure time by hours.”

“Oh. I mean that makes sense, since you’re not taking any classes. I hope you weren’t waiting too long.”

“I have no desire to take classes... If you know how to measure time by hours, why did you get here at the incorrect time?”

“I just thought I would try and have a quiet moment here. I like to come here sometimes.”

Jasper stood silently for a moment, trying to asses what she should be doing in this situation. She was unwanted company. “I can leave.”

“Oh there’s no need for that. We came here to do a job, there’s not much point to tell you to leave, if you’re coming right back.”

Jasper looked at the fountain again. It was still silent, but with another gem there, the sanctuary felt less empty.

“This is a nice place to have... a quiet moment.”

Pearl had walked over to the statue Jasper had been under just moments before her arrival. She was gently touching the stature, as if it would crumble under her fingertips if she pressed to hard. When she spoke, her voice was softer than Jasper had ever heard it.

“You know, it upset her greatly to fight other gems. The gems she was fighting, it wasn’t their fault. She was upset with the other Diamonds, she wanted to save Earth. Rose hated how they sent other gems to fight their battles, instead of fighting along side them. She never meant to start a war, it was just meant to be us two, but other gems joined us. We started to fight not not only the Earth, but for Gems.”

“Why didn’t she do that as herself?”

“The other Diamonds wouldn’t listen to her.”

“She still could have fought as Pink Diamond.”

“Pink felt it was safer to fight as Rose, and it came to a point where she believed she needed to get rid of Pink Diamond. She was told as long as she was there, as Pink Diamond, the colony would be complete.”

Pearl was talking, and Jasper was standing fairly close to her and could hear her just fine, but something about the way she spoke made her sound... distant.

Jasper loosely crossed her arms and looked up at the largest statue. “It’s funny. If she had of fought as Pink Diamond, I probably would have fought alongside you guys. You would of had a lot more gems on your side.”

“But you wouldn’t have been fighting for the right reasons. You would have been fighting for your Diamond, not for your planet or freedom.”

“You fought for your Diamond.”

“No. I fought for Rose, and for the Earth.”

Jasper was done with this conversation. She couldn’t help but think about how different this conversation would have been if it happened two years ago, or even just two months ago.

She definitely would have yelled at the Pearl, maybe would even try to dissipate her. She definitely would have tried to dissipate her if the conversation came before she was corrupted.

“I’ve spent my whole life making excuses for her. I’ve learnt that criticising her actions, doesn’t mean I’ve stopped loving her.” Jasper watched Pearl softy stroke her fingers over the statues hand. “Just because I’m acknowledging her faults, doesn’t mean I’m betraying her.”

Jasper stayed silent, she wished for Pearl to do the same. So why couldn’t she bring herself to tell this gem to shut the fuck up?

“It has taken me 16 years to truely begin to be okay with her being gone- and that’s because I had the support of my family. I know I’ll never truely be okay, and I’ll miss her, but that doesn’t mean I have to be in pain. It will hurt, and it may take a long time, but you will start to feel better when you learn to accept it.”

Jasper grunted and held her crossed arms tighter to her body as she looked down at the ground. “I know Pink... Rose, is gone.”

Pearl’s gaze shifted from the statue to Jasper, and her tone retuned to normal. “Knowing and accepting are two different things. You can logically know what happened, but that doesn’t mean your emotions support that. I don’t expect you to truely understand that yet, we all still have a long way to go.”

She felt like she needed to be defensive. “Did you ask me here to criticise me?” Jasper wanted to summon her helmet, but only found herself balling her hands into fits at her sides, and talking through gritted teeth.

“No. I came here to heal these gems, I asked you here to help. I just thought you might want to talk first. I haven’t been the most welcoming to you since you were...”

“Shattered.”

“Yes.” Pearl couldn’t make eye contact with Jasper at that moment, and turned slightly to face away from her. “I thought you had ulterior motives, but that doesn’t excuse my behaviour. I was able to keep cautious, but calm, with Bluebird. I should have given you the same treatment. The human concept- innocent until proven guilty...” 

Pearl trailed off. It seemed like she started to talk to herself more than she was talking to Jasper. This felt like an opportunity for a subject change, but something Pearl said tugged at Jasper’s gem.

“What ulterior motives did you think I had?”

“Promise you won’t get mad?” Pearl found herself beginning to laugh before she had even finished the sentence. Jasper noted that Pearl had a much louder laugh than she expected from her gem type, as she found herself smiling along.

“I see you realised how ridiculous that request was.”

Pearl’s expression quickly changed to worry before she turned around to see Jasper smiling. She had worried she had made Jasper angry, her tone was hard to read, and didn’t match the smile on her face.

Jasper just shrugged. “I’ve done... a lot since returning to Earth. I’m sure even if your concerns were wrong, it’s not like they weren’t understandable.”

“I thought you were trying to take Steven away from us. He had gone off to you without warning for a few days, and when he came back you were calling him your diamond. I didn’t know he had shattered you, but once I found out he did, I thought you were trying to manipulate him into trusting you so you could hurt him back.”

“Collusion isn’t my thing...”

“Then why did you call him your Diamond?”

“I needed a Diamond to feel.”

“To feel what?”

Jasper took her time to respond. “Anything.”

“Jasper! Your value isn’t measured by how you serve a Diamond. You don’t need a Diamond to be yourself, or to feel. You don’t need a Diamond at all!”

Jasper thought back to a conversation she had had with Connie a couple weeks ago.  ‘What was the term she used? Complicated- no. Concern- also no. It started with Con, or was it Com... what was it?’

Pearl was worried she had said the right thing to the wrong gem, before Jasper lifted her hands up and shrugged again. “I have a complex or two.” 

Pearl’s expression was a mixture of stunned, confused, and concerned. Jasper was definitely done with this conversation, she had said too much, and had no sense of curiosity to make her want to continue even part of the subject.

She may be less antagonistic for these gems, but it doesn’t mean she wanted to talk about her feelings.

She quickly took a breath in and put her hands on her hips, as she spoke louder than she had been. “Let’s heal these corrupted gems, and get on our way.”

Before Pearl could object, to try and talk to Jasper about what she had said, Jasper picked up all six bubbled off the ground. “Might want to hurry up before I accidentally release 6 not-healed corrupted gems.”

Pearl rubbed her hands down the sides of her face, deciding to bring up what Jasper had said with her later, before kneeling down to grab the diamond bottles. She poured a few drops of liquid from all three of the bottled she had grabbed from the temple home.

The diamonds offered their essence whenever it’s needed- all a gem needed to do was go to Homeworld and request it, as long as they could prove it will only be used for good. Pearl and Jasper were only using Rose’s fountain, because Steven was no longer there to use his spit in the bath.

Jasper didn’t pop any of the bubbles, but she did drop all the bubbles into the fountain at once. They quickly popped and the gems gently sunk to the bottom of the fountain.

“JASPER! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?”

Jasper didn’t understand Pearl’s concern until she saw the light escape and mould itself around the six gems. Their forms took shape and colour, which left most of them standing knee deep in water, staring at their new forms before staring at the other gems.

Jasper looked at all six gems with a blank smile, putting her hands back on her hips. “Fuck.”

The newly healed gems in the fountain looked like they were about to rip each other to shards, as they screamed at each other. Two were Crystal Gems, a quartz with a colour defect, and another gem who was much smaller. She had been chucked onto larger gem’s shoulder. 

But the other four were all average Quartz soldiers. Two Amethysts, a Carnelian, and a Citrine, and all Homeworld aligned. They didn’t know the war was long over- of course there was going to be conflict. 

Jasper had made sure to be gentler than last time, like Steven had cautioned her to be (before he though he probably shouldn’t tell her to be more careful with a gem, when he had not long shattered hers).

Although that didn’t mean this time was handled better. She shouldn’t have put all six bubbles into the fountain at the same time, not when the Diamonds weren’t there.

Her urgency to put the conversation behind her made her act irrationally, but that was nothing she couldn’t fix.

Jasper put the index finger and thumb of her left hand to her lips, and used them to amplify her whistle. Jasper took a deep breath to yell as loud as she could be bothered. “Oi dipshits. Fall in.” She leant over to Pearl. “Maybe get your girls to fall in too. A few steps away though.”

Pearl looked at the Crystal Gems who stood in the fountain, who held each other defensively, as the Homeworld aligned soldiers suddenly shot up at the sound of Jasper’s voice, and fell into single row squad in front of her. 

These gems would be fools if they were to disobey an order from this Jasper, even though she held no hierarchal authority over them.

“Uhh, come here?” The two remaining gems in the water looked at each other in confusion, before cautiously stepping out of the fountain, to stand beside Pearl, the smaller gem still on the Quartzes shoulders.

The larger Crystal Gem leant down, and put a hand beside their mouth to whisper “the fuck is going on? What happened?” loudly into Pearl’s ear.

Pearl just laughed out a relieved sigh, as she shook her head. “So much.”


	4. Blunt Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jasper makes another mistake with handling the healing of these gems, but goes back to her apartment with a nice thought on her mind.

“Rose is dead.”

This statement caused the four Homeworld-aligned gems to cheer, before Jasper loudly shouted at them to ‘pipe the fuck down’.

“Jasper! She isn’t dead! I mean, she wasn’t shattered, she just, gave up her physical form to-“

“She’s basically dead.” The gems went to cheer again before Jasper cut them off, loudly. “But she was also Pink Diamond.” All six of the newly healed gems looked at Jasper in disbelief.

The two groups of gems had different ends of the same question. ‘Our leader, our friend, was a Diamond?’ and ‘Our Diamond was the enemy?’ Before they could ask for her to elaborate, Jasper began to speak again.

“Also it’s Era 3, the Authority doesn’t exist, and we all do whatever.”

Pearl was shocked at how Jasper was handling it, although, she wasn’t given time to make a plan with her on how to approach it, before Jasper rushed into it. “Jasper! You can’t just say all that so bluntly! Plus you’re leaving out so many important details.”

“Why not? Say all the main shit first, then let them ask questions. Easy.”

Pearl groaned. “Jasper, we try to ease into things. Like when we told you.” Jasper laughed. The laugh was loud, fake, and heavily exaggerated.

“Oh yeah, when you told me. When I emerged from the stupid water, and then after I tried to attack Steven, I saw that all three diamonds are just sitting up there, and the Runt comes up to me and laughs at me before she bothers to explain anything. Easing into things really helps.”

With the sympathetic look Pearl gave Jasper, she regretted going on her little tangent. Pearl was going to say something, before the Citrine spoke up.

“Uhh, this argument is great and all, but what the fuck is going on?”

Jasper looked down at the gems she had just helped heal. She needed to asses the situation before continuing.

These gems had just been healed. They were about to fight each other thinking they were still in the midst of a war, when Jasper broke them off. Jasper then dumped a few major events from the last four and a half thousands years, before she just started arguing with Pearl.

She was complaining about her experience of how it was handled, but was what she doing any better?

“Pearl. I think... it would be better for you to take over this.”

Pearl looked as surprised as the other gems did. “Oh- okay?” Pearl asked the gems to sit down in front of them. Jasper decided to sit down too, facing the line of gems in front of them.

One of the Amethysts looked Pearl, and then looked at Jasper. “So, what ranked gem does this Pearl belong to? Is she yours? Just wanna know how high up this little speech that’s gonna happen is coming from.”

The smaller Crystal Gem scoffed at the Homeworld gem. “Pearl doesn’t ‘belong’ to anyone.”

The two Crystal Gems were sitting together, or at least, the smaller gem was sitting on the larger gem. They were about a foot away from the four Homeworld gems, that were sitting so close together they might as well be leaning on each other.

Pearl stood next to Jasper. Even sitting, Jasper came up to Pearl’s elbow.

“Thank you Jasper. I understand that you’re not used to listening to a Pearl, but there have been many changes. Everyone is equal now, and free to do what they want. There are still ways that you can be guided, programs to help you understand everything, and how to cope with the change.”

Jasper didn’t physically react when Pearl put her hand on her shoulder.

“We’re all still learning. We’ve all started learning at different times, and some people learn to cope with this big change quicker than others. I’ve been on Earth since the war, and I still wasn’t ready for things to change. We’ve all got each other, there’s no divide between Homeworld and Earth. You’re free to return to Homeworld or any other planet, but you’re also free to learn to live on Earth.”

Pearl gave the gems in front of her a soft smile. It was easier to talk to these gems, they were mostly Quartzes- it was a lot harder to tell an Agate that she had lost her rank and Authority, than it was to tell a Quartz she didn’t have to take orders and fight anymore.

Well, with the exception of Jasper of course.

Jasper put her arms out behind her as the way she was sitting changed from leaning forward to leaning back. She accidentally brushed past Pearl’s foot, but she didn’t seem to mind. Her hand hadn’t moved from Jasper’s shoulder as she moved her position. It was still gently resting there, and for some reason, Jasper didn’t move it.

“Even if you don’t want to live here, it’s probably best to learn about shit here before going back to Homeworld.” Pearl smiled down at Jasper, which made her look away. “Learn the history, or whatever.”

“History?”

Pearl put her hands together, and looked at the gems in front of her. “Well, this may be hard to hear, but the war has been over for four and a half thousand years. You’ve missed a lot, and have a lot to catch up on.”

The gems looked devastated. Had it really been that long? How many of their friends had been corrupted too? How many had spent the last four and a half thousand years thinking they had been obliterated?

“We are happy to catch you all up at Little Homeschool. After you’ve learnt about the new regulations, you can chose if you want to go back to Homeworld, or your former colonies, or if you want to learn how to live on Earth. It’s entirely your decision, and you’re allowed to change your mind somewhere down the track.”

The gems exchanged uneasy looks. What felt like just hours ago, they were fighting each other. Trying to slash their way through each other’s physical forms, trying to shatter each other’s gems. But now, they were just sitting in front of a fountain, being told it was thousands of years ago.

“Huh, so I guess we don’t have to fight you guys anymore?”

The Crystal Gem Quartz laughed. “I guess not.”

The gems went silent. They felt lost, their new forms felt uncomfortable to look at, but most of all, they were just scared of what they missed. Pearl’s words were reassuring for the gems, although they were still uncertain on just how different things were.

Jasper was baffled at how the gems were just, sitting there, talking to each other about how ‘wild’ it was that they’d missed so much.

“How are you guys just, instantly okay with all this? What if we were lying?”

Carnelian laughed. “Why wouldn’t we be? We can either take the view that this way of life is what Our Diamond wanted for us, or we can just be happy that we’re free to be ourselves. You could be lying, but if you were, I think this would have been handled a little better.”

They began to laugh, even Pearl. They had a point, Jasper just sat and sighed.

‘I wish it was that easy for me. How is it that everyone else is just, instantly happier when it’s explained to them. It only made me feel more conflicted.  
I suppose I did just sink into the water after I stopped trying to attack Steven, but I felt ashamed in myself. These gems just seem, a little overwhelmed, but happy to be alive.’

Jasper hadn’t noticed that she had zoned out, until she finally heard Pearl trying to catch her attention. “Uhh. Jasper?”

She shook her head, as if it would shake away her thoughts for another day. “What?”

“Well, nice to see you’re back to Earth.”

Jasper was confused, she still wasn’t familiar with Earth phrases. “What do you mean? I haven’t left Earth in years.”

“No, I just. I meant. Took a few times of saying your name for you to respond. You seemed distracted.”

“Yeah. Whatever... Let’s just get these gems out of here.”

Jasper stood up and brushed herself off, waiting for the other gems to help each other up.

There were eight gems there, six of which were Quartz soldiers. Not all of them could comfortably fit on the warp pad at the same time.

Pearl, the two Crystal Gems, and one of the Amethysts went first. Jasper waited a few moments with the other Amethyst, Carnelian, and Citrine. Jasper hadn’t been this close to so many Earth made gems since she was healed, and before that, she had barely seen any since the war.

Citrine began to take a step on the warp pad, before Jasper out her arm out to gently pull her back. Not even two seconds later, the warp pad lit up, and Pearl’s form appeared.

The three gems were amazed at Jasper. “Woah, how did you know the warp pad was about to be activated?” Jasper just shrugged.

Pearl smiled at the gems. “Well, are you going to come? Or are you just going to stay here.”

“We were about to get on the warp pad, when you got in our way.” Jasper’s tone barely changed, same with her expression, but Pearl felt like it was a light hearted comment, and smiled.

They stepped onto the warp pad with Pearl, and seconds later found themselves in Little Homeworld. The healed gems bunched together, all in awe of the scene around them.

“We can wait a few moments for you all to take everything in.” Pearl stepped over to Jasper. “You know, I’d be happy to teach you how to tell the time.”

“Tell the time what?” Jasper’s voice stayed at her usual, disgruntled tone.

“No. I meant, I can teach you how-.”

“I know what you meant. It was a joke.”

One of the newly healed Quartzes laughed. “I didn’t realise The Jasper had the capacity for humour.”

Jasper gave a small grin. “That makes two of us.”

“You surprise me Jasper.” Pearl looked at the gems, as they stood around the warp pad, looking at the buildings, and watching the gems who had already established a life on Earth for themselves. “You know, for someone who doesn’t want to attend any of the classes, suggesting it to others is an unexpected recurring theme.”

Jasper grunted and shrugged. “I don’t have to want to do something to suggest it to others. Everyone else seems to do just fine here, so they probably would too.”

“You probably would too.”

“Urg.” Jasper clasped her hands together, like Pearl had done many times. “For there being ‘no pressure’ on me to join this regime you lot have going on, it seems to be suggested to me a hell of a lot.”

Pearl lifted her hand to her chest, as she laughed at Jasper’s poor imitation of her. “Yeah well, there’s no pressure, but we don’t want you to forget it.” She paused for a second. “You’re using Earth phrases now?”

“Am I?”

“I mean, ‘hell’ is a human concept.”

Jasper paused for a second. “Yes.” She noted that she should research what ‘hell’ was. She had learnt how to use the word by listening to other Quartzes, but didn’t know what it meant.

“Well, speaking of suggesting Little Homeschool to gems, look at who it is.” Pearl pointed over to a familiar gem.

Standing a few feet away was the Aventurine Quartz Connie had dissipated, and Jasper had helped heal a couple months earlier.

She was talking to another Aventurine Quartz, one that was never corrupted. When she noticed Jasper out the corner of her eye, she smiled. She quickly said something to the gem she was talking to, before walking over to Jasper.

She hadn’t seen Jasper since she had been healed, and was excited to speak to her.

Before Jasper could react, the green gem jumped on her, and wrapped her arms around her neck in a tight hug. Jasper’s hands went to her waist, originally to push the gem off of her, but much to her surprise, she ended up reciprocating the hug.

It felt awkward and unnatural. Jasper knew she wouldn’t, but it felt like the gem was trying to dissipate her form in the tight embrace. 

“Thank you so much for telling me to go here. This is one of the best things I’ve ever dome! I’ve even found my friends again. Thank you Jasper.”

Jasper let go of the gem, and let her drop back down to the ground. “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

Jasper had started the day by waking up in the wrong spot at the wrong time. She had felt a little off all day because of it, and now felt somewhat overwhelmed. This morning, Bismuth had playfully slapped her back, then Pearl had touched her shoulder, and now a gem she barely knew had hugged her. She was more surprised at the fact that she hugged the Aventurine back.

They were small acts of physical contact, of affection, but it was all so much for Jasper.

“I think I’m gonna go home, now.”

While walking past the few buildings to get back to her own, Jasper was looking through the windows. There were classes being held, as Jasper walked past, she found herself watching Lapis teaching a sculpture class.

Their eyes locked. Jasper didn’t know why, but she just gave Lapis a small nod. Lapis looked confused before giving a nod back, and continuing to teach her class.

Jasper continued to walk off. It felt like an odd interaction, but it also felt relieving to be able to acknowledge each other, without there being any sort of antagonistic tension.

Jasper sighed loudly as she closed her door behind her. She leant her back against the door, her full weight was in the door. She slowly began to sink to the ground, and leant the back of her head against the door with a thud.

Something she had said began to tug at her gem. It wasn’t in a bad way, it was just something that wouldn’t go away.

‘Home? I called this place home? I don’t think I’ve ever called anywhere home before.’

It made Jasper smile.


End file.
